Marriages are filled with joy and sometimes sorrow. How can we handle those situations when understanding is difficult? What helps us to have a compassionate heart? God shows us how to love our spouse and have a compassionate heart with words and actions.
What Does the Bible Advise for Having a Compassionate Heart?
A dictionary defines compassion as a “sympathetic consciousness of other’s distress together with a desire to alleviate it.” Empathy is another way of showing love by seeking to understand another person’s feelings.
The Bible is God’s Word and, therefore, trustworthy and unfailing. Scripture shares many verses about having a compassionate heart. In the Old Testament, the prophet Zechariah told the people that their acts of mercy and compassion were more important than their fasting.
“And the word of the Lord came again to Zechariah: “This is what the Lord Almighty said: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.” (Zechariah 7:8-9 NIV)
The apostle Paul wrote the book of Ephesians while imprisoned in Rome. He encouraged people to be responsible in caring for others, to have high moral standards, and to demonstrate love and compassion. Ephesians also tells how husbands are to love their wives.
Peter, an apostle of Jesus, encouraged the wives of unbelievers to submit to their husbands so the men would come to know Christ. He urged every family member to give love and compassion to each other, even when it wasn’t easy.
“Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.” (1 Peter 3:8 NIV)
Luke, the traveling physician, was known as a person of compassion. In Luke’s gospel, he shares about the compassion of Jesus and the way He interacted with the people, including women.
We are called to show compassion and care for God’s creations throughout the Bible. Husbands and wives, children and parents, young and not so young, friends, and strangers. God tells us to love one another.
Does Having a Compassionate Heart Mean Letting Spouses Get Away with Everything?
People express feelings in various ways. When all is well, joy may fill conversations. Other times, when there are difficulties, different emotions may be shown. What should we do when our spouse has broken our trust or acted in a way that brings heartache or disappointment? What about when we are overtired and respond before thinking?
How can you forgive a spouse who continually hurts your feelings or breaks a promise? Are we supposed to let that person “get away” with their actions because they are our spouse? We’re called to love, have compassion, and understanding. Yet that may take time and many prayers for guidance.
Forgiveness is important in any relationship. However, allowing a spouse not to take responsibility for their actions may lead to more heartache and wrong choices.
Children are watching and absorbing the words and actions of their parents. Modeling a loving and compassionate marriage will guide children in their relationships.
When a spouse has broken trust or acted hurtfully, we can go to God and pray for them. Ask God to heal the relationship. Ask God to help us with forgiving our spouse.
Honest and heartfelt conversations are sometimes the key to repairing marriages. Sometimes, a mediator or clergy may be needed to help each person understand what happened and why.
As we pray for our spouse, that doesn’t mean letting the person get away with everything. What if there is danger in the marriage? What if one spouse refuses to acknowledge any wrongdoing? Perhaps seeking wisdom from a skilled professional or clergy may help with resolution.
Disagreements will come and go in marriage. At those times, we must remember to forgive as Christ forgave us. We are not called to punish or judge.
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” (Colossians 3:13-14 NIV)
**If at any time there is physical or mental harm in marriage, seeking help is key to establishing honesty and safety. Seek assistance if needed. Taking care of yourself and others is having a compassionate heart for everyone.
12 Marriage Activities to Gain a Compassionate Heart
Successful marriages involve prioritizing time together, listening, hearing, sharing, loving, having a compassionate heart, and much more. Whether the couple are newlyweds or have been married for many years, there are ways to strengthen the connection. Placing God first in the marriage is important for a meaningful and loving bond.
Activities listed are ways for marriages to gain a compassionate heart.
1. Prayer. Pray alone and together. Ask God to cover your marriage with His love and peace.
2. Look each other in the eyes when speaking.
3. Listen to what the person is saying and hear their words.
4. Pray before speaking. Responding without prayer may cause hurt and stress.
5. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. In other words, think about how you would have acted or responded in the situation.
6. Remember that God is in control. Seek His guidance.
7. Share time with your spouse. Take walks, listen to worship music, and volunteer together.
8. Sit together and share your honest feelings.
9. Discuss what is happening in the life of the marriage, such as finances, medical issues, and family concerns.
10. Discuss the joys and praises of the marriage. Remember times of laughter and joy.
11. Thank God for the marriage.
12. Thank God for showing us how to have a compassionate heart.
10 Prayers to Keep a Compassionate Heart
1. Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for this marriage. Please help us both to have a compassionate heart and to show Your love and glory in all we say and do. Amen.
2. Father, thank You for teaching us how to have a compassionate heart. May we always pause and pray before responding. Amen.
3. Lord, Your mercies and compassion never fail. Please cover our marriage with Your love and peace. Help us to acknowledge the feelings of each other. In the name of Jesus, Amen.
4. Abba Father, thank You for teaching us how to have a compassionate heart. Help us to remember that we all fail and sin. Lead us as we strive to make our marriage strong and a good example for those around us.
5. Dear God, I struggle to have compassion for those who hurt me and my marriage. Guide me to respond in a positive way that shows Your love. Give me the words that You want me to share. Thank You. In His Name, Amen.
6. Lord God Almighty, I pray I will have compassion for my spouse. I pray I will remember that we all fail at times. I pray my response and words will show Your love and forgiveness. Amen.
7. Father, help me to keep a compassionate heart during times of difficulty and doubt. Thank You for the comfort and peace You provide. Amen.
8. Dear God, open my heart to find compassion. Forgive me for the grudges I continue to hold against my spouse. Please give me a compassionate heart. Thank You. Amen.
9. Almighty Father, thank You for loving my spouse and me with everlasting love. I pray we will keep a compassionate heart towards each other. Amen.
10. Heavenly Father, Your compassion is the true example for all. Guide us to keep a compassionate heart in every situation. Thank You. In the name of Jesus, Amen.
Do you have a compassionate heart for your spouse? How can you show the love of God in your marriage?
Blessings,
Melissa Henderson
Photo Credit: © Getty Images/fizkes
Melissa is the author of Licky the Lizard and Grumpy the Gator. Her passions are helping in the community and church. Melissa is an Elder, Deacon, and Stephen Minister.
Follow Melissa on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and at http://www.melissaghenderson.
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