Many Christians have lost sight of the beautiful nuances of God's love for each of us. The human condition is that we are unable to meet God’s perfect standard of holiness on our own. Unfortunately, the current 'cancel culture' encourages us to draw sharp lines around things that seem wrong or that we struggle to understand.
Yet, Jesus offers us a profoundly different approach to dealing with sin. He challenges us by asking, "Who among you is without sin?" Only those free from fault can justly cast stones (John 8:7-11). Remarkably, Jesus, the only one with the authority to judge, reaches out to those ensnared by sin, inviting them to follow Him and offering them a chance to leave behind their burdens of pain and regret.
It is our calling to embody the love of Jesus to our lost friends and to encourage those who know God yet wrestle with their own struggles. While remaining true to the standards laid out in Scripture is essential, we must also seek divine guidance in learning how to love others genuinely and compassionately. In the midst of sin, wisdom is paramount in every circumstance. We need to humbly ask God to equip us to walk alongside those we care about, sharing profound truths in a spirit of love and kindness. Thankfully, as James 1:5 promises, whenever we seek wisdom, God is more than willing to grant it liberally.
With that in mind we can use biblical principles to guide us to walk the line of truth and love with our LGBTQIA neighbors.
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1. Remember, God Is the God Who Sees
Genesis 16:13 says, “Then she called the name of the Lord who spoke to her, ‘You are God Who Sees’; for she said, ‘Have I not even here [in the wilderness] remained alive after seeing Him [who sees me with understanding and compassion]?’”
In this story, we read about a second-class outcast woman whom her master used to try to produce an offspring when things weren’t going as Abraham and Sarai had planned. As she is wandering in the desert, at the brink of death, she is met by God. She asks the Lord his name, and his response is mind-blowing.
He is the God Who Sees.
He sees us—the whole us, who we really are. He understands our pain, desires, confusion, and struggles, and is the ultimate judge of our hearts. He works in our lives in unique ways, so we might come to know him and his love.
When we capture this, we can let go of some of our misguided need to be judge and jury when encountering the sin of others. We can trust that God sees them, sees us, and is doing all he can to reach us. We can let go of the need to cancel and embrace a heart of love for others.
We often struggle to offer friendship, a listening ear, and a place at our tables with those struggling with sin because we are scared that God is not big enough to handle our struggles. We tend to urge, convince, or even worse, shame someone who is lost to the way because we are anxious for God. We can’t change God’s Word to make sin less than it is, and we also can trust that God can speak to the hearts of all humankind, no matter what our struggles.
As believers, we can let go of cancel culture because it’s not our job to cancel; we are here to be the light to all who know us. If you know a person who identifies differently than you, God calls you to be a light to them. You don’t have to change the bible, you don’t have to say what they are doing is best, but you can show them the love of Jesus.
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2. Love Your Neighbor As Yourself
Mark 12:31 says, “The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
Jesus himself said these words. More than anything, he wants us to love others well. God’s love is not void of boundaries, but those boundaries never feel oppressive.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 states, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
God’s love seeks to protect others, is humble, is never rude, resentful, never delights in sin, and seeks truth.
When considering how to interact with our LGBTQIA neighbor, we can go back to what the BIble defines love as and consider if our response is compatible with this list. Some helpful questions to help us navigate our relationships include:
Do our actions embody kindness? Are you pointing those we know to the truth? Are we patient with other people's stories? Are our actions showing endurance? Are we telling others about the hope of Jesus? What boundaries do we need to place to remain safe in our relationships? Are we willing to listen before we speak?
Every relationship is different because a person is so much more than their gender and sexual identity. We have to see people as a full person and prayerfully consider how God wants us to show up in our relationships, with God’s definition of love as our guide. Unfortunately, that means there is no one-size-fits-all answer to what the right way to navigate a relationship is. Every story is different, and to do it well, we have to rely on God’s gracious guidance.
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3. Display the Fruits of the Spirit
Galatians 5:22-23 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
When doubting how to treat someone, refer to the fruit of the Spirit. When we embody these character traits, we are less likely to harm those around us. Our role as part of our community is to be people who show who Christ is. We do this by regarding all other humans as precious beings created in the image of God.
As you decide how to interact with your LGBTQIA, consider how you can embody love. How can you bring them joy? Offer them comfort that leads to God’s peace in their lives. Show them kindness. Offer them good gifts and point them to God’s plan for their lives. Offer a gentle reply and show them how God gently leads us towards his way. Display self-control even when you don’t see things eye-to-eye.
We may have to pause at times to really consider how we can live with the fruits of the spirit with our neighbors, but the Bible encourages us to be slow to speak and quick to listen (James 1:19). Taking our time with the people we interact with regularly is one way to show them kindness. It’s how we build bridges in the long run, rather than destroying ways that we can be agents of love in our communities.
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4. Remember, God Is the Judge of Our Hearts
Many people we interact with in our lives may be living in a way that goes against the Bible. Our job is not to condemn them as their judge but to show them who Christ is through our actions.
Matthew 7:1-2 says, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
Jesus encountered many who were stuck in dark places, and he showed them the way to Heaven by offering them undeserved grace.
James 2:13 says, "For judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not shown mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment."
God is a merciful God, and he desires that we also show mercy to those around us. All have fallen short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23), so each person requires God’s gracious mercy. His kindness leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4). We are to be that kind of person to every person we meet.
I feel this tension in my own life as a foster parent. The people I interact with, whom I am parenting alongside, have lifestyles that I disagree with. Their actions have caused harm to people I love deeply. Yet, despite my frustrations and selfish tendency to be harsh towards them, I constantly hear the Holy Spirit remind me that my job is to show them kindness and that his job is to handle the condition of their hearts. Sometimes I have to hold back and choose to speak less, but in the end, it’s one small way I can be obedient to God through my willingness to choose kindness and trust him with the outcome of their souls.
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Originally published Monday, 09 June 2025.