A Prayer for Those in the Trenches of Parenting
By Peyton Garland
Bible Reading:
“The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.” - Isaiah 58:11
Listen or Read Below:
I wasn’t a plant lady until I became pregnant with my son. Perhaps all the excess estrogen was taking my maternal role of “nurturing” to a whole new (leafy) level. About midway through my pregnancy, a sales associate at our local plant shop convinced me to take home a pothos in a beautiful wicker hanging basket. That baby thrived, and I decided collecting plants was for me!
One thing I’ve discovered since becoming a plant lady is that each plant is different. They have personalities. Some are shady and don’t want to face the bare sun. Others crave bright daylight all day. Some guzzle water while others will drown easily. Some plants need shallow dirt with a wider circumference so they can grow out. Some need deep soil because their roots run vertically.
Did you know there’s a botanical hack to parenting, too? You can plant flowers in the trenches of raising your children, no matter how deep the mud or dry the terrain, whether toddling tornadoes or mouthy teens. We are kidding ourselves if we don’t confess how hard it can be to volunteer our best to everyone in the house but ourselves. Our time, energy, resources, laughs, smiles, and kind words are reserved for the youngsters padding through our house. All we leave ourselves when the long day is done is harsh words of criticism and a two-second shower—if we have the energy to take one.
Ignoring the trenches won’t teleport you out of them, so in the hard seasons when you’re up to your elbows in parenting’s muck, plant flowers there. Easier said than done? Probably, on the front-end, at least. It sounds like one more chore, one more thing on the to-do list that’ll be half-done at best. But on the flip side, planting those trench flowers might just save your household.
What do these trench flowers look like? Where do they come from? What do they cost? They look a lot like you, come from you, and cost only your pride.
These trench flowers look like the you who tells your children, no matter their developmental stage, that parents aren’t perfect. In my house, that often looks like me saying, “I love you! And Jesus loves you best!” It’s saying sorry when I’m wrong and reminding my little one that Mama can’t do it all because she’s only human. When you set the expectation that Mama can’t be perfect and that God’s love is always better, you lift the proverbial weight that’s causing you to operate out of shame and guilt.
Meanwhile, these trench flowers are planted by your vulnerability and watered with your honesty. Let your children understand your greatest fears and allow them to recognize your inadequacies. Teach them to take these things to God in prayer. When you are genuine in front of your children, they learn they can be genuine too. No need for secrets or a fear of imperfection when Mom and Dad are around!
Remember, these trench flowers will only cost your pride, your willingness to not save the day, and your inability to do it all because you know you can’t. This doesn’t mean you don’t try your best or that some days won’t feel like a victory, because they will, but it means you shower your household in the healing lessons of forgiveness, grace, and mercy. You plant and harvest only hope in Jesus, and nothing less.
Let’s Pray:
Father God, just as you make beauty from ashes, you allow us to plant seeds of lasting hope in the thick of parenting. On our hard days raising resilient, God-fearing children, thank you for crawling through the mud with us and letting us watch your faith bloom in our households. We praise you for your steadfast goodness and love. In the strong name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.
Parenting in the trenches can feel overwhelming, but even our messiest moments can plant seeds of grace. How are you letting God use your imperfections to point your kids to Him? What “flowers” of faith are blooming in your home right now? Join the conversation on Crosswalk Forums!
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Jacoblund
Related Resource: 5 Things Parents Need to Tell Their Kids About War Right Now
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Drawing from his experience as a Marine who lived through the wars following 9/11, Jeremy explains why moments of global conflict can become powerful opportunities for parents to teach their children about courage, faith, and moral clarity. Rather than avoiding difficult conversations, parents can use them to help their kids understand fear, the reality of evil in the world, and the responsibility we have to stand for what is right.
This conversation explores how parents can alleviate fear, explain why conflict exists, and demonstrate a faith-filled response when the world seems chaotic. Jeremy also discusses the importance of teaching children the difference between necessary and unnecessary violence, why standing against evil matters, and how faith in God provides stability even in uncertain times. If this episode of March or Die helped your spiritual perspective, be sure to follow the show on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!
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