A Softer Voice in Stressful Moments

Your Nightly Prayer

TONIGHT'S SCRIPTURE

Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips! (Psalm 114:3)

SOMETHING TO PONDER

As a department manager, one of my jobs is to talk to employees about problematic behaviors and patterns. Sometimes, before one of these meetings, I imagine saying every frustrated thing that is on my mind. But I have to make sure my heart posture is right before I open my mouth. I ask my boss for advice, and she has a lot of wisdom to offer. Even though she understands my frustration, she models compassion. Then I pray for the Holy Spirit to help me.

James 3:8 warns, “No human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” I need the Lord to “set a guard [...] over my mouth” so that I don’t hurt someone. Praise God - there have been times when the words coming out have not been my own. God has powerfully protected me from myself and protected the other party from my anger. Even if my feelings were justified, there is nothing redemptive about putting someone down. After all, my goal is to try and inspire change, not cause tears. The Holy Spirit prevents me from becoming the reason my own boss has to have a difficult conversation with me.

The Lord is my rock, my fortress: my lips are the drawbridge which his Spirit guards, behind which something beautiful is going on - a long-term, sanctifying work. My heart is being changed so that I consider this person’s suffering and challenges, and wonder how to help, instead of fantasizing about shooting verbal arrows over the battlements. Moreover, I am humbled by remembering how the Lord would be justified if he vented his wrath at me because of my sin. Yet he does not.

YOUR NIGHTLY PRAYER

Father, thank you for the many times you have prevented me from saying unwise, cruel things. Thank you for conviction and forgiveness when my imagined words have been uncharitable, and when they have slipped out and been unkind. Thank you, Father, for the people who have dealt with me kindly when they were frustrated with my mistakes. Lord, in the Gospels, your Son Jesus Christ was merciful and loving with sinners. He was compassionate, yet firm and truthful. Help me to be like Jesus in my day-to-day thoughts and speech. Amen.

THREE THINGS TO MEDITATE UPON

1.Do I want to put someone down, or am I trying to bring about positive change? Proverbs 25:15 proclaims, “With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.” I aim (imperfectly) to break down barriers to understanding with a calm, sensible demeanor that is beyond reproach, even if the other person does not respond as I had hoped.

2. Words are born from thoughts. What internal narrative has led to this frustration? Perhaps a sense of entitlement or pride is distorting how I see a situation. I ask the Holy Spirit to help me change the dialogue in my head so that compassion drowns out selfishness. I’m inspired to ask kinder questions and to want the best for this person. Part of guarding my tongue is opening my ears and my heart. As an ambassador of Christ, I long to be set apart as one who loves others well.

3.The consequences of someone else’s actions are still very real. Even after examining my heart posture, if my anger is justified, I still need Jesus’ help. I might not receive acknowledgment from the offending party, but I receive something better if my approach is merciful. By choosing to do good when someone else commits evil against me, Scripture says I “will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward [me]”. (Proverbs 25:22)

Reflect on tonight’s prayer and share how God met you there. Join the Your Nightly Prayer discussion on the Crosswalk Forum.

Candice Lucey is a freelance writer from British Columbia, Canada, where she lives with her family. Find out more about her here.

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