"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows." Matthew 10:29-31, ESV
This past holiday season, sickness plagued our household. Tending to two children with high fevers and nagging coughs left me emotionally drained. Before my husband's feet crossed the threshold of our home, I bounded past him. I was done for the day.
I went on a long walk, desperate for a moment of solitude. As I slugged along, ugly thoughts surfaced loudly in my mind. I wonder if you relate to any of these tangled-up beliefs.
I take care of everyone, and no one appreciates what I do.
I get zero time for myself; someone always needs something from me.
Do any of the mundane things that take up all my time, like laundry, doing the dishes, grocery shopping, even matter?
As I walked, I shared these gut-honest thoughts and feelings about my disappointment with motherhood and being a wife to God. I cried out to him about how often I often feel worthless, unseen, and unappreciated as a wife and mom. I didn't feel shame or intense guilt for my feelings, I simply dumped everything I was feeling onto the Lord through lament.
The trail I was walking on came to the water's edge as my thoughts and tears dried up. I looked up from the glassy water as a swarm of birds swooped up and down above me. It was one of those moments when you know without a doubt, the Lord is using His creation to communicate with you. That’s when our key verse came to mind.
"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows." Matthew 10:29-31, ESV
In the time when Jesus walked the earth, two sparrows were cheap! From the perspective of the world, they were essentially worthless. If we think too long about the value culture places on the people who keep us clothed, fed, and nurtured, we end up feeling worthless. But we were never meant to find our worth in our roles or our achievements. Just like the little gray birds of the world, God’s gaze is upon us constantly. He knows us intimately, and He values us. Yes, even more than the birds that never slip from his view.
So if you find yourself in a similar situation, where you wonder if you even matter to God, or question if the ways you serve in so many seemingly insignificant ways are making a difference in the lives around you. If you feel maxed out from taking care of everyone when your needs seem to go unnoticed, may I remind you, as the Lord reminded me, that you are worth everything to Him? He sees you, and you are valued by Him. You matter to Him and nothing you do for Him, no matter how small, is ever in vain (1 Corinthians 15:58).
Let’s pray:
Dear Lord,
Thank you for allowing us to be honest and raw about how we feel. You know what it’s like to be undervalued and unappreciated by the standards of this world. You encourage us to cast our cares on you because you care for us. Lord, our worth is not measured by what we do or accomplish. Help us to remember we are valuable because of who we are in you! And from that, everything we do has a great purpose because it brings you glory! Amen.
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Emma Simpson
Looking for authentic conversations about how to deal with body image, insecurity, and comparison issues as a Christian woman? The Compared to Who? Podcast is the show for you! Twice a week, we tackle tough topics like dieting, disordered eating, weight loss, aging, body dysmorphia, and more from a practical, grace-filled, gospel-centered perspective.
