Building Back Up in Beautiful Ways
LYSA TERKEURST
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“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.” Matthew 7:24 (NIV)
Over the last couple of years, I’ve watched my 30-year-old home undergo several renovation projects. Renovations are not for the faint of heart. They cause a mess, the results are sometimes slow, and the process can feel never-ending.
I’m learning home renovations are so very similar to heart renovations — especially as I’ve walked through painful seasons and relationship hardships. I’ve jotted down some important lessons about healing that I’ve collected from my renovation projects, and I want to pass them along from my journal to yours:
1. Sometimes you have to tear things down before you can build back up in new and beautiful ways.
It’s impossible to see true transformation unless you remove the damaged and unhealthy portions first. Houses and people are alike in this way. Sometimes we have to work through what was so we can move on to what can be. This doesn’t always mean we have to remove people who don’t want to cooperate with healthier patterns for our relationship. But it may mean we create boundaries that clearly outline which behaviors are acceptable and which are not. We establish boundaries not to shove people away but rather to hold ourselves together.
2. Working on the foundation isn’t appealing or attractive, but it’s important.
Jesus spoke of this truth in Matthew 7:24-27:
“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash” (NIV).
Building our lives on anything but God’s Truth will result in a shaky foundation — a detriment to any building project before it even begins. We must put in the necessary hard work of building our lives and our faith on the solid ground of Scripture, daily seeking God.
3. It’s good to stay humble enough to realize sometimes you need to get professionals involved.
Some things you can do on your own, and some things you can’t. Many small home repairs can be handled without professional help, but major renovations must be carefully handled by those with skill and experience. The same is true with the deeper emotional work in our lives. Doctors, Christian counselors, and therapists are trained to bring renewed health and restoration to both body and soul. My family and I have benefited greatly from professionals in seasons when it was necessary for healing, and we’re so grateful for that.
One of the hardest realities I’ve had to face is that it’s not always possible to fix broken relationships. Heart renovations, like home renovations, take diligence, patience, and a whole lot of prayer, and through the process, we have to accept that some things can be changed and others cannot. But with God as our Master Carpenter, we can live assured — we are a beautiful work in progress.
Track the progress you do see. Be patient with the setbacks. Celebrate even the small wins. Stacks of small wins turn into big wins. Eventually, you’ll be so glad you pressed through when you see the beauty that comes from all the hard work.
God, help me have patience with the renovations You’re doing in my heart. In the messy middle of the process, help me see the beauty that’s taking shape and the joy that can be found even here in this season. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
THIS IS THE RESOURCE YOU MIGHT NEED
Sometimes, to get your life back, you have to face the death of what you thought your life would look like. Lysa TerKeurst understands this on a deep level after experiencing the painful and unwanted end of her marriage of nearly 30 years. But she’s also walked through a significant healing journey that she wants to share with other women who are facing a similar heartbreaking reality. That’s why she wrote her latest book, Surviving an Unwanted Divorce. Written alongside theologian Dr. Joel Muddamalle and Licensed Professional Counselor Jim Cress, this resource offers biblically based, practical strategies for growing in faith and self-awareness as one season of life ends … and another hope-filled season begins. You can preorder your copy here and start reading the first three chapters right away.
ENGAGE
Find real-life encouragement when you connect with Lysa TerKeurst here on Instagram.
FOR DEEPER STUDY
Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (NIV).
Take some time today to ask the Lord which areas of your heart need renovation. How can you invite Him into this healing process daily? Let us know in the comments.
© 2025 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
P.O. Box 3189
Matthews, NC 28106
www.Proverbs31.org
