The Process Of Forgiveness
Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you
Here are 12 simple steps you can use to walk through the process of forgiving someone who hurt you in the past.
Ask the Lord to reveal the names of the persons who offended you and the specific wrongs you suffered. Face the hurt and the hate. If you are going to forgive from your heart, you must let God search the depths of your heart. Acknowledge the significance of the cross
. It is the cross of Christ
that makes forgiveness legally and morally right. Decide that you will not retaliate by using the information about the offender's sin against them (Luke 6:27-34
). Decide to forgive. Forgiveness is a conscious choice to let the other person off the hook and free yourself from the past. Take your list of names to God and pray the following: "I forgive ___(name)___ for ___(specifically identify every remembered pain)__ ." Destroy the list. You are now free. Do not tell the offenders what you have done. Your forgiveness is between you and God unless the offenders have asked you for forgiveness. Do not expect that your decision to forgive will result in major changes in the other persons. Instead, pray for them (Matthew 5:44
). Try to understand the people you have forgiven. They are victims also. Freedom is a result of forgiveness in you. In time you will be able to think about the people who offended you without feeling hurt or anger. Thank God for the lessons you have learned and the maturity you have gained. When appropriate, accept your part of the blame for the offenses you suffered. Confess your failure to God and to others (1 John 1:9
) and realize that if someone has something against you, you must go to that person (Matthew 5:23-26
Prayer: Lord, teach me how to love unconditionally and forgive quickly those who hate me, curse me or mistreat me.
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