Christian Foundations

DEVOTIONAL ARCHIVE

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by Dennis and Barbara Rainey

Ephesians 5:33
Nevertheless let each individual among you also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see to it that she respect her husband.

Unfortunately, some men hear only Paul's words about women being submissive and take this as license to be domineering. It's impossible for a wife to submit to a man who doesn't respect her needs as a woman.

Every husband needs a wife who respects him. That means she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him and esteems him. From a negative point of view, not respecting your husband means to be insulting, critical, nonsupportive or passive towards him and his needs.

One way to respect your husband is to consider and understand the weight of his responsibilities as a servant/leader in the home. It is easy to look at your husband and see what is wrong instead of right. As someone once said, "Faults are like the headlights of your car, those of others seem more glaring."

Your husband needs unconditional acceptance-faults and all. As a Kenny Rogers song puts it:

She believes in me.

I don't know just what she sees in me,

But she believes in me.

One way to communicate respect to your husband is to accept his schedule. For example, in past years I had to learn to be content with a schedule that found us packing up and leaving for most of the summer for Dennis's teaching assignments, conferences and meetings. We also had to learn how to live a great deal of time out of a suitcase and even out of the car.

When it gets to be too much, I tell Dennis and we make adjustments. Yes, my husband's schedule is important to me. I choose to be a part of what he does, to watch and help, and to be available to him. And I know by choosing to support Dennis in these ways, I am actually showing him respect.

Prayer:

As a wife, ask God to grant you a better understanding of your husband's needs so that you will be able to know how to express your respect of him.

Discuss: Ask your husband when he has most felt respected by you. Ask him why.

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