Coffee, please," I told the waitress.

Quickly, the waitress filled my cup so I could sip away while deciding what to order. I added cream and sweetener to suit my taste. Just the way I like it, I thought.

The waitress returned to take my order, armed with a coffee pot. Since I was the only customer in the place, she hovered over me. Suddenly, blup! Eager to please (or hoping for a larger tip), she topped off my coffee and left.

I forced down just enough of my spoiled brew to add a little more cream and sweetener. I took a couple of gulps and then ? blup!

Again she destroyed my tasty blend. How could she do this to me?

This time, I set my cup down on the far side of the place setting next to me. The meal arrived. I smiled. Then, an arm shot in front of my face.

Not again!

Once more I repeated my cream-and-sweetener ritual. Hurriedly, I drank my just-right coffee.

Between bites of sandwich, I realized the waitress wasn't the only one who's given more than the other person really wanted. I thought of times I've been asked for advice. I found just the right words to say. But I didn't stop. I kept adding more.

It's happened when I've disciplined my children. I said the proper fatherly thing. I made my point. Then, I uttered one sentence too many, causing resentment.

Life situations often call for a mixture of humor and seriousness, praise and correction, rhetoric and restraint. For both coffee and counsel, finding the right blend is worth the effort.